Catherine's Surgery

So Dr. Touloukian's office called to schedule Catherine's surgery to remove her mole. Mean mother that I am, I told them I wanted to do it during one of her breaks as I hate taking my kids out of school if I don't have to (I even scheduled her Make-A-wish trip during last year's winter break). The surgery will be on February 18. Took me about a day to realize that that date had some meaning...her surgery will take place exactly 3 years to the day that she went in for surgery to have her port placed and then to have her first dose of intrathecal chemo (meaning that the chemo is injected directly into the cerebral spinal fluid) and a bone marrow aspirate to determine just how many leukemia cells were present. Just realizing it made so many memories flood back for me. Her diagnosis was on February 16, the Thursday before President's day so the surgery fell on a Saturday of a holiday weekend. The surgical team (which was headed by Dr. Touloukian) was called in especially for Catherine. It was 8am when they wheeled my crying child down (along with her equally hysterical mother and stoic father). I remember the doors opening up and just seeing a sea of doctors, the surgeon and his team and then the oncologist and her team. After some discussion of what would take place, Catherine was taken away. Dave and I were in the waiting room by ourselves trying to process all that was happening to us. It was very surreal. Three years later and there are times I still can't believe it all happened. The recovery room was just us and the one nurse who came into help out, comforting us and telling us that Catherine would be okay. After that we were brought back to her room and our education on all the medicines began. We were back down there the following Friday for another dose of intrathecal chemo and another bone marrow aspirate, but this time the place was open for business so Catherine had to be isolated. It was the following month when we had to go back for all the same things, but this time to also determine how effective the first month of chemo was, that Dave and I were in the waiting room with the "general population" of parents. I remember this one family going on and on and on about how upset they were about their child's surgery. I can't remember what it was, tonsils being removed or ear tubes, something like that. And I was thinking yeah, it's tough to have your kids going through surgery I get that, but I wanted to grab this woman by the shoulders and shake her and say...get over it, my kid has cancer and she is in there having chemicals pumped into her body right now so shut the f**** up already.
Anyway, I had always hoped that when Catherine's port was removed last June, it would be my last time at Yale. I know being there that day will be difficult for me. This time of year always has been since her diagnosis. Last year we were flying to Disney for her Make A Wish trip. It was fun, but it only emphasized the fact that she was a kid with cancer. My consolation this time is that we are proactively preventing cancer, not being blindsided by an unbelievably life changing diagnosis.