Ended up in the Hospital

So for those of you who read the last post, my reprieve from Yale was short-lived. When I sent Catherine to bed, she had no temp. Checked her again when I went to bed, still no temp. At about 1 a.m. I heard her hacking away. I got up to check her and her temp was 102.5 - Dr. Elisha said to head on up. I arrived with her at about 2 a.m. I will admit, this is our 4th time in the Children's ER, including the time she was diagnosed, and the upside of being an oncology patient is that you are treated like a high roller in Vegas - they are awaiting you with open arms and you never wait.
Catherine was very good during the admit process in the ER and even on the drive up there. She was looking forward to the playroom and the playgroups they have. Her hopes of a fun stay were very much dampened by a diagnosis of RSV (Respiratory syncytial virus) - basically a very nasty cold with a big name. We all get it, but it is more common and more dangerous in infants, the elderly, and people with compromised immune systems. Because it is so contagious, we (me too) were basically isolated in our room. When the nurses and docs came in they had to wear gowns and gloves and the one time a day they let me out to get my Dunkin' Donutes coffee, I was ordered to just go in and out of the hospital - no hanging out and no socializing with other parents so as to not infect them. Not an easy stay for either of us. At first they didn't even want to bring toys in from the playroom for Catherine, but I made a big stink and reminded them that it was their job to clean them when she was done with them and they gave in to me. Luckily she tested negative for any bacterial infections and she was afebrile for 24 hours straight - the only problem was that her counts plummeted - her ANC went from 1500 upon admit to 500 the next day and then 300 on Saturday. Dr. Elisha let us go home, but since her counts were low we were told that we would have to still go up to the hospital even though they knew what was causing the fevers. We will go back to Guilford Tuesday for a check and until she tests negative for RSV we will have to enter the office through a separate entrance directly into a room so as to not come into contact with the other patients.
So both kids will be home from school this week (figure I should just keep Alex away from anything going around too). Should be fun-filled and I am sure I will need a drink by Friday!

Please Pray

Just a quick request for prayers for one of Catherine's little friends. Perhaps some of you recall a post back in July where I mentioned a little girl who relapsed during Long Term Maintenance, needing a bone marrow transplant. She received her BMT at Sloan Kettering in late September. Sadly, I just learned that her leukemia is back. Actually, when you relapse during treatment or after a BMT, it means that the leukemia never went away - it just played an excellent game of hide and seek and won (this is why treatment for acute lymphoblastic leukemia is so long - you are searching out those hidden cancerous cells). This almost 4 year old is an only child to a couple who lost another child 5 years ago (due to prematurity at birth). They will be trying a new very toxic drug to try and kill the leukemia. Please pray that it works and that 2007 brings them the miracle they need. This little girl is the one child Catherine seemed to connect with at the office (probably because they have similar personalities). Catherine sometimes ask for her and I try to change the subject - no need for her to know her friend is so very sick.
On another note, I saw the child psychologist today. Nothing surprising and happily she does not think Catherine needs to meet with her. She explained that Catherine is at an age where she is more aware and starting to process what has happened to her - which can be called a trauma. As a result, she has gone from a very outgoing, fearless child to a more cautious child with fears. This is what is causing her separation issues. The fact that she is strong-willed and a perfectionist has not changed, however, things probably came too easy for her before - now she has physical and social limitations (due to the chemo) that are frustrating her and causing tantrums. I have been given tips on how to handle these issues - hopefully they work. She also told me that it is okay to "grieve" the child that Catherine was a year ago and not feel guilty for wanting the old Catherine back, but we must also learn to deal with the new Catherine and accept that this is the hand that she has been dealt and not ask "what if this never happened". I know we will get through this. I must go now as Catherine actually has a low grade fever. Dr. Elisha is giving us a reprieve and not dragging me to the hospital unless the fever hits 102 as she seems to simply have a cold. Hope that's all it is. Thanks for all your love and support.

Puddle Jumping!!

God Give Me The Strength!

Well, it's that time of the month again. I should try to come up with a clever name like PMS for the 5 days we deal with Decadron (the steroids), particularly on Saturday, Sunday and Monday when we also have to deal with the Vincristine pain. Eleven months post diagnosis and I have finally realized that the reason Sunday tends to be the worst day is because that is when the Vincristine really kicks in and the pain from that just further ignites the roid rage that starts a few hours after the first dose on Friday and peaks by about Sunday afternoon. It is horrible and I hate that my patience seems to wear thin more easily each month. During these times Catherine becomes very clingy, but also a bit nasty. For the first time, we got a lot of lip. Today Catherine hated everyone, but me. Surprising given that I still discipline her during the roid weekend and Dave can somehow get a few smiles from her. I am always thankful that our schedule managed to work out in such a way that Catherine's monthly chemo treatments are on a Friday so that Dave is here to help during the worst of it. He is so much better at handling her on these days. I wish I were better at it. But, that is how we balance each other out - while I am good at giving her the medicine (and finding very unique ways to give it to her without having to crush or dissolve pills) Dave is great at playing with and distracting her and Alex.
By Thursday she will be back to her old self.
Things have been going well so far in 2007. Catherine's ANC has been very high the past month. And as always, as soon as we start to talk about raising her chemo, her ANC falls right into the range they want it to be in. Very strange, but God must know that I hate crushing and dissolving pills, and I already cut up some - I don't want to start having to cut up another pill.

Catherine's hair is really coming in now - it looks like a pixie cut and is quite elegant. I don't know if I could pull off the look. She absolutely loves her hair and doesn't want to hide it with hats or hoods. Luckily, the winter has been mild enough that I can give in to her on that one. Catherine also started ice skating lessons - her first extra-curricular activity in 11 months. She absolutely loves it and I am glad I was able to find an indoor activity where I don't have to worry too much about germs - the rink is like the Arctic and the kids all have gloves on their hands. Alex is dying to go out on the ice too and he wears his helmet to all her lessons. Good thing as he threw a 10 minute tantrum on the first day banging his head on the ground. We also had our first dentist appointment sincer her diagnosis. I have to admit I was worried - let's face it, she gets her medicine in a fruit roll up every night and she eats a lot of sugary food. Thankfully, Catherine not only looks like Dave, but she got his healthy teeth. Because Catherine's immune system is suppressed, she has to take a 1000 mg (yes 1000) dose of amoxicillin an hour before all her dental appointments (the mouth and gums are a major entry point for infection). Seeing as we were in Guilford that morning, I didn't have time to brush her teeth after giving the medicine in a big serving of chocolate pudding, so not only did they brush the plaque away, but they also cleaned all the dried up chocolate on her mouth.
Otherwise, things are going well in the Vogt home. Daddy Day at school is coming up this week, which Catherine and Dave are very excited about, and Dave's 35th birthday is next week. Drs. Darryl and Elisha are leaving in 2 weeks (nauseous is the only word to describe how I feel about that) and this Wednesday I will finally meet with the child psychologist (thank God she is in Stamford). After that, we will be coming up to her one year anniversary. How time flies and I hope it continues to go as quickly.
Catherine and Alex took some time out of their busy lives to jump in puddles the other day. One of my neighbors tends to get a pretty deep one that Catherine loves and introduced Alex to now that he finally got his own rain boots. Enjoy these lovely shots.